What do you do for a Living?

As I stand on the virtual unemployment line, (my internet connection is slow today) I start reflecting on my latest round of interviews. You see, I was that do-it-all person that companies create when they cannot sufficiently organize and structure their business, create a sound and efficient sales plan, and hire people to do the strategic thinking that years of business experience and training created. So where do I find myself now? I already said.

That leaves me with one crazy looking piece of paper. What are your strengths? Well, due to my lack of focus in one area for too long, my strengths lie in being able to switch my six thinking hats fast enough for no one to notice. Why would you like to work for ___? I'll try anything once at this point, as you can see. Oh, and you're hiring. Why are you currently unemployed? Thanks to working with expensive merchandise in a bottoming-out economy, my position was sliced up into a million pieces, and thrown back on management and lower level assistants, plus a little touch of backstabbing that I hear didn't work out in the long run which I'm sure thats too boring to go into detail, but the real answer is disappearing dollars! I don't know where any of it went but we saw it coming in a year ago. What have you done during your last two months of unemployment? Get paaaaaaaaaaaaaaid, son! Oh and did I mention that I took money off the books for a small project that also didn't make it through the economy's version of Mike Tyson's Punch Out? When are you available to start? Well, since you asked, can I start after my birthday? Its in two weeks and I might as well take it easy till then, since all of this rest has really been good to me. Would that pose any kind of inconvenience? It would? I can start tomorrow.

So I'm still unemployed and livin large; taking care of a sick dog that would never get the care she needed if I was employed, seriously examining my last three years of employment so as to truly focus on which of my millions of responsibilities put a smile on my face and take it from there, pulling my newly single self together to become independent, stronger, self-efficient, self loving, (not selfish) and cherish and nurture my multi faceted personality and interests, like writing! Do I really want to jump back into the workforce and give all that up? Yeah, of course I do...I need the money.